I feel like shit here in this place. I don't even know why GOd place me here, I'm probably better off living in a better place far from here. Here, I don't get any filling of life in my cup. I get nothing but dust. I can't even get what my heart desire. I can't even get the one that completes my incomplete life. What the hell am I suppose to do here?????JUst stay here? Work?Play games by myself??GO to church like a good little boy?Hang out with friends which I get no value back from them!??Adults giving me advices which I already know???? Argh!! It's crazy here!! I feel like I want to go insane or blow!
Here, I feel that I'm so useless!! I get nothing which satisfy my heart! Nothing but pain and aches.Every time when I'm so close to getting it, someone would just swoop in and take it away like a F***ing eagle catching it's prey.I contribute or lend them my help, but I get nuts in return!I hate being the nice guy every time, most of them will use my kindness for their own beneficial,....I keep thinking why the heck did I do it anyway?? I didn't get anything in return! I felt like destiny or fate is playing with me, not giving me what I want but what it wants....like I'm sort of a freaking puppet who has no control over his own life. I know it's wrong to be selfish....but I fucking hate that theory. Being nice doesn't fucking help at all!!
This is really bunch of crap... life.