It's true, I'm an idiot...I keep calling other idiots , idiot...when I myself is also one of them.I'm an idiot for believing that there's hope or a miracle.I'm an idiot to believe that there's a chance I might get a breakthrough in my life this year. I'm an idiot to believe that all my prayers will be answered, a forgotten thing which will return to me.I'm an idiot for not believing in reality instead of faith.
I'm an idiot for believing that friends are always there for each other. I'm an idiot for having alot of friends in my life when all they do is mock me or look down on me. I'm an idiot for trusting the closest friends I have, there's no such thing as a close friends or best friends. I'm an idiot for being a helpful person. I'm an idiot for being dependable for others. I'm an idiot as a friend who is not worth it.
I'm an idiot for believing that love could happen through friendship. I'm an idiot who thinks that I could get back with the person whom I vanished from for 2 years. I'm an idiot who keep wanting to go out with that person I vanished from , when all I get is being postponed or cut away at the last minute because something came up or her other friends suddenly change their mind and say that "we're free!!". I'm an idiot for being patient. I'm an idiot for hoping that it'll work out with me and her. I'm an idiot who falls for her . I'm an idiot for believing that God would bless me a miracle with her, that something magical could happen. I'm an idiot for believing that I could out beat her ex bf by hanging out more with her which I now think it's a mistake and I'm losing to that idiot.
I question myself alot, why does God allow an idiot like me to be here...I'm not worth it.